Twas 3 Weeks Before Christmas

Originally Posted December 3 2016

According to facebook it is time for my 7th annual murdering of a famous poem so here we go;

Twas three weeks before Christmas, on a panic stricken world
The people, exhausted, their anxiety whirled
The year had been heavy, full to the brink
Things falling apart all around, too fast to even think

But during this season there’s hope we can find
Though it takes talking about Jesus (I hope you don’t mind)
See 2000 years ago, in a small town in the hicks
Was full to the bursting, to fulfil some leader’s kicks

But amidst all the politics, corruption, and hate,
Was a plan being fulfilled which would change all our fate
Each person was selfish, their own agenda they sought
In fact, against God, most of them fought

But in spite their intentions, their power, their schemes
God’s plan will unfurl, just as he means

For numerous promises, that night was fulfilled
From across thousands of years, just as God willed.

It was in a small stable, a child was born
Born of poor family, weary, forlorn
And from this small child, a war would be won
A victory at the price, of God’s only son

But thanks to that life, I here now can say
That the world will go on, for God won that day.
Don’t worry of countries and politics and war
Don’t worry of money, relationships, or more

God won the day, our destiny is sealed
Death has been conquered, the curse been appealed

So as you lay down in bed, on these cold winter nights
Thank God for His son, and for His great might

Merry Christmas

~Malcolm

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Modern Day Bible

Originally Posted November 27 2016

I sometimes feel that if the Bible was written like our modern Western society acted it would probably read like this:

“And on the first day; God brought forth the ‘Creation Project’ before the committee… and on the ninety ninth day, the project passed on a 55% confidence vote given the requirement that Lucifer was left to make sure the humans didn’t go messing with trees they weren’t supposed to.”

Fun Musings

Originally Posted September 23 2016

Fun Musings:
A person who sees something no one else can see is considered a lunatic… until other people are affected by said thing, then he is considered a genius

If you aim to fail, and succeed, what have you accomplished??

The early bird may get the worm…. but the pizza shop doesn’t open till much later… just saying….

Being alive has one of the highest mortality rates of most things you could do in life….

When you think about it… people act like who they are not, to impress people who act like THEY are not…. for fear of not matching up to the level you are at which you are not…

If we honestly created anti gravity…. would the thing we applied it to suddenly start flying across the earth at the speed the earth is spinning?

What if everyone sees the world COMPLETELY differently, but since we’ve been raised to apply certain words to certain images, no one’s really caught on yet?

Have you ever wondered what kind of mental state the people in math problems who buy like…. 40 watermelons must be in?

Ultimately the most effective weight loss program is to fly to the moon…

I sometimes feel like the platypus is the ultimate proof that God has a sense of humor…

The living body digests matter… turns it into energy… and then turns that energy into skin, hair, nails, bone, and other stuff…have you ever thought of how kind of crazy that is?

Beethoven was ultimately the first musician to think of “Good Vibrations”

I used to think that puns were the ultimate proof that comedy does NOT originate from suffering…. however, considering peoples’ reactions to some of my puns… I’m not so sure…

People who are really tired really shouldn’t write facebook statuses…

Common Problems

Originally Posted August 30 2016

I can never tell if it’s encouraging or discouraging that within about 7000 years worth of recorded history we have access to, that 90% of things people struggled with were and still are love and money… Kind of encouraging that the world is still spinning having argued everything we are currently arguing before, kind of discouraging we still haven’t gotten out of this loop….