Taking Control of Life

Originally Posted August 18 2016

The older I get, the less I seem to trust people who talk about “taking control of your life!”, “Not relying on anyone but yourself!”, “Anyone could do this if they tried!”

Life is not meant to be lived alone… Humanity is just not capable of supporting itself without the influence of others. More often than not, I find the people who boast their success, usually owe it to many things that were already outside of their control.

Maybe they were born to a wealthy family… Or had influential connections… Maybe they had ridiculous amounts of charisma or were super attractive to others… In every case though… For every person who stands in the spotlight claiming success, there are usually 4 more people in the shadows taking the bruises for all their mistakes.

Don’t get worked up… Don’t go shouting “down with the 1% for homogenized is better!” Or popularity shaming…. Believe it or not… The people who have the most go their way in life usually get the worst end of life you can imagine.

See, money will eventually dry up… Even the most charismatic person will have people grow tired of putting up with them… The most attractive model will one day grow ugly… The most natural talent will one day hit the edge of their talent…. And when this day comes their world will fall apart…

For they lived their lives believing that what they perceived was reality and have suddenly lost their support forcing them to see all that they missed on the way down. Some never recover, scrounging together what pieces of a life they can hold onto. Others may try to grow better, but their muscles are weak, and the ones they used to look down upon have been fighting their way forward far longer than they have so it is hard to catch up.

If you want to see a role model… Or leader… Or mentor… I find we are so quick to turn to the loudest, proudest, most confident person we can find… But these people rarely are wise choices as quite often they have bought into the lie that they were the ones who guaranteed their current position. Instead, look for the ones who point you to others. The ones who realize they are weak. The ones who are fascinated and blown away by the sheer talents and abilities of those they have been blessed to meet.

A good leader is not necessarily the strongest, for the strength of one person is still very weak. A good leader is someone who sees the strengths and weaknesses of those around them and most of all within themselves. While one may be weak, together we are strong

Now side note: this is not saying there is no benefit in working yourself. Life takes effort. But realize many amazing talents live alone, on the streets, die in empty lives…. No matter how strong you are… You will not make it far without those around you

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